It's almost over

Well, Christmas is just about over for another year.  One more day of family & too much food & gifts, and then we close the books on 2009.

It's been a long Christmas season this year; a good Christmas season.  Family & friends, church, gifts, video games, festive drinks, chocolate - too, too much chocolate!  Far too much food.  (We should really consider renaming 'December' something a little more appropriate.  I'm thinking 'Gluttonuary'.)  Time off, staying up too late, getting up too early....

And now, I'm about ready for a long winter nap.  The poor ol' immune system has been put through the ringer over the past week, and I'm pretty sure I'm about to explode in mucusy ickiness.   Oh yeah, and I just found out that one of my little cousins happens to have the chicken pox - which means that he was most likely contagious on Sunday when I saw him.  To the best of my knowledge, I've not had the chicken pox.  Wouldn't that be a grand way to begin 2010!


Speaking of the end of the year, Check out this blog post: 1000 Awesome Things.  I don't think I could say it any better myself!

Christmas, Christmas, Christmas!

Christmas starts for me today.  It's a good 6 days long this year  :)  Good times.

My Christmas cactus is blooming.
The thing is probably 30 years old; first time it's ever actually bloomed at Christmas.  Woo!

That is all.

Merry Christmas!

I promise, this isn't how I cook! ...well, not all the time anyway

Christmas Cookies

Christmas Cookie Ingredients:
1 cup of water
1 tsp baking soda
1 cup of sugar
1 tsp salt
1 cup of brown sugar
Lemon juice
4 large eggs
1 cup nuts
2 cups of dried fruit
1 bottle Jack Daniels

Sample the Jack Daniels to check quality.

Take a large bowl, check the Jack Daniels again, to be sure it is of the highest quality, pour one level cup and drink.

Turn on the electric mixer...Beat one cup of butter in a large fluffy bowl.

Add one teaspoon of sugar...Beat again. At this point it's best to make sure the Jack Daniels is still OK, try another cup ... just in case.

Turn off the mixerer thingy. Break 2 leggs and add to the bowl and chuck in the cup of dried fruit, Pick the frigging fruit off floor... Mix on the turner. If the fried druit gets stuck in the beaterers just pry it loose with a drewscriver. Sample the Jack Daniels to check for tonsisticity.

Next, sift two cups of salt, or something. Check the Jack Daniels.

Now shift the lemon juice and strain your nuts. Add one table. Add a spoon of sugar, or somefink. Whatever you can find. Greash the oven.

Turn the cake tin 360 degrees and try not to fall over. Don't forget to beat off the turner.

Finally, throw the bowl through the window, finish the Jack Daniels and make sure to put the stove in the dishwasher.

CHERRY MISTMAS!

Makin' Tracts

I had never even seen a Christian Tract until I was in my 20's; they're not really something that mainline church denominations use.  Typically, they're tools (booklets) handed out by Evangelical churches to neatly package up all the reasons why you should 'be reborn' and 'give your life to Christ'.

I personally think they're kind of cheesy.  Pre-packaged Christianity doesn't usually work so well.

But anyway, the point is this:

Being that I work in a church, I sometimes actually enter the sanctuary to clean things up or whatever.  Yesterday I happened to be in the church, and found two tracts left by somebody after a mass.  These are not tracts the church gives out - I've never known a Catholic to hand out a tract - so I don't really know where they came from.  They were just weird enough that I thought I shouldn't leave them sitting in the pew though, so I took them.

The first one was a comic strip retelling of A Christmas Carol.  Marley tells Scrooge that he'll be damned to hell unless he repents and finds the saving grace of Jesus Christ.  It doesn't take Scrooge much convincing, and then he's running around telling everyone 'God bless you!'

The second one was unlike any other tract I've ever seen!  It starts at the main character's, (Charlie), funeral.  Charlie goes to heaven.  Then all of Charlie's friends die, and they go to hell.  The friends are some PO'd that Charlie is in heaven and they aren't, and even more angry when an angel tells them that Charlie believed in Jesus but they didn't.  "But, we didn't know Charlie was Christian! He didn't tell us!!"  Charlie then gets a massive guilt trip from an angel about not telling his friends about Jesus and how he could have used tracts if he was too shy or scared to talk to his friends.

So this tract publishing company is using tracts to advertise to people to use that brand of tracts to tell their friends about Jesus, otherwise their friends will surely burn in hell for all of eternity.  Wow.  Them's some good marketing skillz!

After all, if I hand out just 3 tracts each day, I could 'reach over 1000 people every year!'

*Sigh* No wonder so many people think Christians are lame.

You ever notice....

That when you run into the grocery store really quick to pick up one or two things, that upon entering the store, there is not a person at any of the checkouts?  And yet, exactly 32 seconds later (when you are ready to leave), no less than two dozen people have come out of nowhere and clogged up ever single checkout.

Every time.  Every single time.

Just for future reference...

A 'pinch' of salt is much less than a 'dash' of salt.

Oh, and if you want more info on that sled... they sell them at Crappy Tire, and they have a website.



Gotta admit, watching this video makes me think of the fun-ness which could be had at Harrison Park.  There's also a video where a bunch of crazies ride a helicopter to the top of a mountain and sled down.

Oh S#@& !

(SNOW)

What's the difference between a 'heavy flurry' and a 'snow squall' anyway?

And what's the deal with a 'Snow Squall WATCH'??

Caution: You live in Canada; it is no longer construction season, it might snow.  Hard to believe, I know, but it happens.

And speaking of snow, have you seen these things?:

I think I'd like one!  However, they're $40!!  A concussion really isn't worth that much to me.

On another note, notice anything different on the ol' blog today?

:D

Got those youth group videos converted!  Thanks Dave  :)

Return of the youth retreat video

There was a time when I used to play a fairly crucial role in running an annual weekend retreat for my youth group.  It was a TON of work, kept me up late at night, consumed my thoughts for MONTHS, was incredibly stressful, and the absolute HIGHLIGHT of my year!

Our retreats always had themes that sort of kept things flowing throughout the weekend, and linked our games & activities with our bible studies and sessions.    One year, 2006, the theme centred around superheros.  This rather gianormous undertaking involved me making a few videos (with the help of some of the youth) to show at the retreat.

2006 technology not being what it is today, and my personal technology at the time lagging WAY behind anything available in 2006, I patched together something pretty awesome, and the kids loved it!

I then burned the videos onto a 'VCD' (I did not own a DVD burner at the time) so that the videos could be watched on a DVD player.  Erased the files off my computer, had an awesome retreat, and promptly lost the VCD of the videos.   I have litterally been looking for that disk for years!  I have looked everywhere humanly possible, and given it up as a lost cause.

Today, looking for an empty jewel case, what do I find?  THE VCD!!!

Moment of truth: Does it even work anymore??

YES IT DOES!!!

BEST. CHRISTMAS. EVER.

Now... all I have to do is somehow rescue the files off this mysterious VCD formated disk, convert the files to something that is actually playable, and upload to YouTube for all to enjoy!

Yay!

Dunk Rye for Me!

My 'supplier' of Pearls Before Swine comics has been having computer issues and hasn't been posting daily comics lately.  It's one of my more favourite comics, so I miss not starting my day with it.  Anyway, today was a good day and all the comics from the past two weeks have been posted.

I like this one specifically:

Eh? *poke*poke*  Get it??  Evita... "Don't cry for me Argentina."
Ok, well, I thought it was funny

I should watch Evita again sometime, it's a good movie - well... if you're into musicals about the lives of political figureheads...

Lists

Well, it's December 2009.  You know what that means, right?
The best & worst lists of the first decade of the new millenium are starting to trickle in.

I read one from the Toronto Sun today; it was pretty pathetic.  The journalist tried to argue that the 2000s were the 'meanest' decade, and then included the fact that Charles Schultz died to make his point.  Not sure how Snoopy's creator dying has anything to do with the decade being labeled as mean...  But maybe what's on the list doesn't really matter as long as you're the journalist who publishes a list first.

 Maybe writing a list isn't such a bad idea though.  Taking time to reflect on the past 10 years of your life has some merits.  For me, this past decade represents one third of my life - a lot of adventures, a lot of growing up; plenty of stuff I can't remember, some things I'd rather not remember!

2000 - started working part time at the church
2001 - graduated from college with honours in business (whatever that means)
2002 - worked answering phones at a car dealership for a couple months.  That sucked.
2003 - went on an epic road trip with friends (Nova Scotia).  filled up my time babysitting a couple kids
2004 - went to bible college
2005 - worked at a summer camp
2006 - Started working full time at the church.  Spent all my free time volunteering at the summer camp and hanging with friends
2007 - another epic road trip with friends (Alberta).  The last of my grandparents passed away :(
2008 - yet another epic road trip with friends! (Tennessee)
2009 - Lots of hiking & camping this year.  My bro got married.

Lots of stuff happens in 10 years: Jobs, education, evolving faith, building friendships, new vehicles, weekend trips, volunteering, inside jokes, crushes, dating, drifting friendships, rekindling friendships, family events, babies & marriages, accidents, illnesses, death, ...  Good times and bad, all experiences which shape us into the people we are today.


What about you?  10 years is a long time, what have you done with it?

Letters to Santa

It was a big deal in my house at this time of year to carefully flip through pages and pages of toys in the Sears Christmas Wishbook to pick that one thing to ask Santa for.  Carefully write it down on a piece of paper, (always remembering the manners with thanks for last year's gift), scrawl your name at the bottom, and confidently mail it off through Canada Post knowing that Santa would answer.

Of course... one year he didn't answer...  I hold no grudges though; he still managed to guess what I really wanted anyway.  (That letter was returned to me some 20 years later - it had fallen behind a desk at the post office and was found when doing some renovations.)

One year, not too long ago, I took it upon myself to mail some letters to Santa on behalf of some of my bible college friends.  Some of these friends had never received a letter from Santa; some of these friends didn't even know he would write you back!  2006 was a good year for them I tell ya!

Here are the letters I wrote and mailed on their behalf (don't worry, none of the addresses are current).  And yes, they did all get replies!:

 

Santa Claus
North Pole Canada
H0H 0H0

Keep up the good work Bill!

It's too bad that Bill Murdoch didn't stay as an Independent when he was booted from his Conservative caucus last fall.  Otherwise, I might vote for him once in awhile.  Yeah, he's got a loud mouth that gets him into trouble once in awhile, but at least he sticks up for us!

If you haven't heard what his current shenanigans are, you can read about them here.

-------------------------------------

Mr Murdoch,

It never ceases to amaze me at what lengths you will go to in standing up for the people of your riding.  Thank you for being our voice!

HST concerns me, and it concerns me because I don't understand it.  It's like a dark cloud slowly looming in the distance, but I for one don't really understand the implications of it, or the reasoning behind it.  Now maybe that's my own fault; there's probably plenty of information about it out there on the internet if I so choose to go looking for it.  But there seems to be a lot of rumbling about it with no clear picture as to how it is really going to affect the average joe.

Aside from this HST adding to the costs of a number of our goods which currently aren't taxed, my greater concern is from the viewpoint of a non-profit organization.  It's all well and good that the government is going to send us all $300 cheques for the next two years to make up for it, and that there will be a drop in income tax, but an income tax reduction doesn't do a thing for a non-profit.

I am the bookkeeper of a group of churches in your riding.  As a charitable organization, we are refunded 50% of all GST we pay throughout the year in regards to the general day-to-day expenses of the church.  That rebate averages about $7,500 each year.  We are also refunded for all PST we pay on building materials and renovation expenses.  Our PST rebate averages about $2,500 per year.

Now, what's going to happen to that $10,000 worth of rebates?  $10,000 is no small chunk of change for a church!  That's the difference between running at a deficit or a surplus for the year.  We rely on that money; we expect that money.  Am I going to have to go tell an entire church congregation that we're going to come up $10,000 short next year??

I've already heard that our PST rebates are going to become defunct, and that there is a whole office full of people in Kitchener (who specialize in PST rebates) who are going to lose their jobs because of this.  Are we going to lose our GST rebates too?

This whole HST thing might help out the big guys, but it sure isn't doing much to help us little guys.

Thanks for sticking up for us little guys

Done and done.

I typically dislike Christmas.  Well, ok, it's not Christmas I dislike, it's the gift-giving anxiety leading up to Christmas.  You know:

"Oh, it's December, I should think about gifts.  I wonder what everyone wants."
"December 10th?  Plenty of time still - which is good... cause I have no clue what to get anyone..."
"December 15th.  Crap, crap, crap!  10 days... I hate shopping when the mall is so busy!"
"December 20th.  It's making me sick just thinking about it!  3 gifts to go, 4 shopping days left, and too much stuff to do between now and then!"
"December 24th.  Well... I guess this will have to do.  Hope they like it "  :S
"December 25th.  Oh man, no!  Don't open that one yet!  (I don't think he's going to like it...)  GAH!  I HATE CHRISTMAS!!! IT'S TOO STRESSFUL!"
"December 26th.  Ah... Everything worked out great, and it's all over for another year!  Where did the time go?"

AND THAT is why I don't like Christmas.  But this year!  This year is different!  This year, I'm going relax, and enjoy!  You know why?

BECAUSE I AM FINISHED ALL OF MY CHRISTMAS SHOPPING!!!

That's right!  I am finished ALL of my Christmas Shopping on November 30!  I do believe that this is the first time I have ever finished my present buying before December 20th!  Heck!  It's probably the first time I've ever STARTED my Christmas shopping before December 20th!

Is it disgusting?  Well, yeah, a little bit.  But, no gift buying anxiety this year!  No pressure, no last minute hasty decisions.  And you won't see me waiting in line at those ridiculously long checkouts like a sucker.

So let me be the first to say:
MERRY CHRISTMAS!!

One Year

Well, it's official.  I've been living on my own, in my own place, for exactly one whole year.

It's been good.
It's probably been good FOR me.
...It's been hard on my bank account though.  :)

I was concerned before I moved out that I'd be lonely on my own.
(But I also knew that I couldn't stand living with anyone else!  That's a great way to ruin a good friendship - not that I have many friends up here anyway.  YOU GUYS HAVE ALL MOVED AWAY ON ME!!)

Lonely hasn't been a problem.

When I think about a year, 365 days, it's not that long.  Days turn into weeks pretty fast, and before you know it, tomorrow's the first day of December one year later!

But I've managed to jam a lot of stuff into this past year.  It's been a good one.

Look out below!!

Ugh... So, it's that time of year again - time to put the snow tires on.  Tomorrow actually.  Woo.

On the plus side, I do not need to purchase tires, nor do I have to pay to have them changed.  Did you know Canadian Tire has a deal like that?  Purchase their tires (which are cheaper than at the dealership anyway) and they'll change 'em spring & fall for you.

Now, I used to store my tires at the farm, in the barn.  And every year I'd get a lecture about how 'those tires better not be ready for the dump, cause I'm not paying to take your tires to the dump!!'.  No Pa, if these tires got thrown out on me, I'd be mighty sad because they're pretty much new...

But now that I have my own place with SO MUCH closet space, (as my Ma frequently reminds me as she hands me things she thinks I should be responsible for storing), I just keep my tires here.  Saves my car from smelling like barnyard twice a year.

So... Tonight's job was to dig them out of the closet.  Not a simple task, what with a year's worth of empties and recycling in the way; and folding chairs, and table boards, and window screens, and a vacuum...

Now I have 4 tires sitting in the middle of my kitchen which need to be carried down a flight of stairs and put in the trunk of my car.  Did I mention that they're already on rims?  The things weigh about a thousand pounds a piece!!

I'm considering tossing them out my living room window and hoping that they don't bounce and roll onto the street below.

Ka-Ching!

I was in a casino the other night. 
For the first time in my life.
The colours and flashing lights and noises were overwhelming to me.
I wanted to leave the second I walked in the door.
It was midnight, and there was still an overabundance of white-haired people sitting around.
I had a toonie in my pocket, but it stayed there.
I just couldn't throw good money into a useless slot machine.
It was the first time I've ever shown my ID just to use a washroom.
Speaking of, there were hazardous waste containers,in every stall, full of used needles.
Gross.
And that was my five minute casino tour.

False advertising gets us sent to hell now?

So, now the WePray website has turned into an advertisment for a real videogame about Dante's Inferno and the sixth circle of hell or something.  All legitimately backed by EA Games.

The advertising, if you so chose to read it, (I wouldn't bother - the game looks like poo to me), says something to the effect that performing Mass without a priest present and on unconsecrated ground (ie: playing the 'WePray' game in your living room) is heretical and you will burn in hell for it.


Gee... they got us good there

WePray.... *sigh*

So...  Easter 2010: The exciting new video game so you don't have to wait for Sunday to go to church!




Umm...  A lot could be said about this.

Is it a fake?  Probably.  They do have a website, and they have sent press releases to videogaming websites for publicity.  But... Yeah, I'm sure it's fake.   ...the fact that it isn't being advertised for use on any specific video game console sort of gives it away.  (Also, there isn't any contact information on the website.)  But I must say, it's a very well executed fake!

So... Reaction?

• Well, the anti-Christians are all saying WTF!! GARBAGE!  !@!))@#& Stupid hillbilly Christians think they're so smart. !#)@!!@;#$^  This is exactly why I'll never be a !@!#$#% Christian.
  
• The laid back mainstream Christians are quietly laughing to themselves because it totally pokes fun of Catholics.  (And some of them probably even want to play it just for kicks.)
  
• And the hardcore Catholics, who think that this is the answer to getting their kids out of purgatory faster, are going to be some disappointed when they find out it's not real!

My take on it?  I was amused; they put a lot of thought into this 'game'!   ...of course, I like the movie 'Saved' too.  I guess I'm just one of those laid back mainstream Christians who doesn't mind poking fun at my own beliefs once in awhile.  I mean, seriously, I own a Miracle Jesus Action Figure (with glow in the dark hands)!

There will always be people who will take a joke too far, and there will always be people who take things far too seriously.   I don't think this is anything to get your underpants in a knot over.  And at the end of the day, I think God probably has the greatest sense of humour of all of us.  And that, my friends, is a good thing!


(The website says that pre-orders can be placed starting tomorrow - I guess we'll find out then if this is a hoax or not)

Compassion

Someone I know just posted this video to Facebook.
I think it goes well with my James Loney spiel

Julie Nunes

Have you seen this girl?

The Uke playing sensation on YouTube?

I think she's someone I'd like to know.  She'd be fun to have around.

James Loney

James Loney is in town tonight.  He spoke on violence begetting more violence at a high school this afternoon, and tonight he's speaking at a local church about the war in Afghanistan and alternative ways to make progress in that country.  He has every right to speak of such things, being that he was kidnapped in that country and held captive for 118 days back in 2005. 

I thought about going, I could have gone, perhaps I should have gone.  But... I didn't particularly want to go by myself and I didn't really know about it in time to invite anyone along.  Mike from Regina couldn't get his teleporter to mesh with his warp drive or something like that; Emmerson wouldn't go due to a lack of them serving beer; and Dave, well, he was too whiny, or tired, I don't really remember which. :P  Besides, I actually saw him speak at a Christian social justice festival in Kitchener just months after his release from captivity in 2005 - so I kinda already have a handle on his take of things.

The article in today's paper sums up his thoughts:

What if 30,000 to 40,000 Canadians willing to sacrifice their lives as soldiers were armed with non-violent tactics and objectives, Loney asked.
They'd be equipped with transportation and logistics of a military operation to bring in doctors, build wells and work with artists and educators in partnership to support what's already going on there, he said.
"Have we tried that? No, we've never tried that. So when we've tried it, we've spent $1.2 trillion a year on it, for 10 years, then maybe I will concede, oh, it couldn't work."

 Loney is Christian, and works for Christian Peacemakers, and his ideas do indeed mirror that of Jesus.  Going against the grain, doing things differently, thinking outside the box, walking a mile in another person's shoes, loving your neighbour, turning the other cheek, helping the downtrodden...  Ultimately, being a rebel in your desire to care for humanity, instead of following the crowd in hatred and violence.

2000 years we've been trying to learn these lessons.  It seems that as individuals we can figure out that when you punch a friend, he's going to punch you back and that it's way easier to just get along.  So why can't nations and countries figure this out? 

What do you want from me??

Ok, for some reason my blog comments have been commandeered by certain someones asking for specific post topics.  So much for just allowing the natural creative process to take place.  Since this is going to become a newspaper-esque reader-guided editorial column of sorts, making it my job/responsibility to entertain the masses, there will now be a monthly subscription fee for those readers wishing to read articles on specific topics.  The price is yet to be determined, but you'd better believe there will be HST added!  Also, starting soon there will be an Anne Landers-type 'help me, my life is falling apart and I need advice from a stranger because I have no one in my own life I can trust' feature.  All questions will be answered with lines from ABBA songs - it proves to be very informative and educational.  Be sure to subscribe today!

Anyhue, not wanting to leave my fans in the lurch...
Someone was wondering about eateries in OS.  I can't actually afford more than a jar of peanut butter these days, but I hear that the grease in Ted & Grace's fry truck hasn't been changed since about 1964.  It gives the fries a more intense taste (and a heart attack with every bite).  Just don't light a match anywhere near it, the whole thing could go up in a ball of flames.
Someone else was wondering about vacation destinations in and around the area.  The Paisley Inn isn't too far away.  It's been in the paper a lot lately; must be a nice place.  OR!  WE COULD GO TO THE QUEENS!!  WHAT A GREAT IDEA! * 

Here's your list of randomness for the day:
It seems that Moveber is upon us (a combination of the MOustache, and the month of noVEMBER).  I haven't personally seen an increase in moustache wearing men around, but Facebook seems to be all a flutter with excitement.  Apparently, young men especially will jump on any bandwagon which allows them to wildly grow their facial hair without being ostracized by the general public.  All you have to do is label it as a 'good cause'.   From what I hear, the good cause is prostate cancer.  I'm not exactly sure how growing a 'stache helps prostate cancer (or better yet, helps to find a cure), but it is what it is I suppose.

We all know that the giant waste of time, Facebook, has some pretty useless applications on it.  But there is something highly entertaining about a group of adults sitting around on a Saturday night having a very serious discussion about how to better manage their Farmville plots.  Farm Union talks are underway.

When you lead a life which can be neatly packed inside a square box, sometimes it's difficult to step out on the edge and do something a little daring.  Going against the grain, or throwing aside the rules, is next to unheard of!  But I challenge you to take the risk: the next time you play Settlers, instead of setting up the board in the normal oval-shaped fashion described in the rule book, take a chance and set up the board in any old funky pattern!  Add a lake in the centre of your island, or create two smaller islands connected with a land bridge.  Trust me, it'll spice up your life!

And one for the road...
Did you know that traditional Italian mozzarella cheese is made with milk from the Water buffalo?  I didn't believe it either.  But more importantly,  does everyone have a water buffalo?



*(For those of you not from the Grey Bruce area, this  is a line from an old radio ad.  For those of you who have lived in the area, you're now going to be randomly shouting 'OR, WE COULD GO TO THE QUEENS!!' all day long.  You're welcome.)

BEEP!BEEP!BEEEP!BEEP!BEEP!BEEP!

That's the sound my smoke detector makes when I burn things.  (stupid facebook distracting me)

You know, the smoke detector.  That little white disk attached to my 10ft high ceiling, which is just 1/2 an inch out of reach when I stand on a chair.

GAH

Guilty money?

I've been in financial report writing mode for the last couple days.  It'll be the last big financial update I do before I sink eyeball-deep into year end grossness.  Do you realize that there are only 7 weekends left in 2009?!?!  Ack!

I like my job.  Non-profit is interesting.  There is absolutely no way to predict whether or not you're going to run at a profit or loss for the year (let's face it, it's usually a loss) because your sole source of income is hoping that people give you money out of the goodness of their hearts.  ...not a very good long term business plan, but it's seemed to work so far.

So, in this particular financial bulletin I have made a nifty looking graph to track the pattern of donations over the year.  Naturally, donations spike around holidays.  Specifically, they're at their highest at Easter and Christmas.

Now here's where I go on my fun little bunny trail...

I've come to realize that the Easter donations are always higher than the Christmas donations.

Now to me, Easter (in the very loosest sense of the word) seems to be a time of realizing you're a horrible, horrible sinner and feeling kinda guilty about being the reason God had to die to save your sorry butt from all your sinning.

Christmas, on the other hand, is a time of joy and merriment and gift giving and fun!

Isn't that interesting.  People seem to donate more when they're guilty than when they are joyful.  Huh.

;)

We don't cater to requests here

Someone left a comment on my last post asking for a food blog.  I LOL'd.

I actually almost wrote a post about food just the other day.  It was going to be a poem.  About casseroles.  Because casseroles are awesome.

And then I realised that I had a beer in my hand.  So I stopped typing before things got carried away.  If you think drinking & driving is dangerous, just try drinking & typing!  ...It's got me in trouble on more than one occasion, so now I avoid it when at all possible.  True story.

My other true story for the day goes like this: The spaceship of a car I drive has these silly sensors in the wheels to tell you if your tires are flat.  Now, I'm pretty sure I could tell on my own if my tires were flat without a light on my dash turning on, but anyway.  (Gee... this ride seems a little rough, and I'm having trouble steering.  Must be the road though, there's no warning light lighting up on my dash.) 

Turns out, that light does actually work!  I've been driving around for an embarrassing amount of time, assuming a sensor was probably malfunctioning and ignoring that light on my dash.  Heh heh... Well, I guess my tires were actually a little under inflated.  (under inflated tires are better for traction anyway, right? ...all this cold slippery weather we've been getting.... *sigh*)  Needless to say, the light is off now, and it didn't cost me any money to fix.  I'll pay closer attention to it next time.  That 'check engine' light though... It can't be that important...  (kidding!  just kidding)

No good material

*sigh*  Every once in awhile my creativity well runs dry.  Apparently, people, (a very select few, but they are out there), seem to rely on my blog for a bit of entertainment.  I'm glad my writing can deliver once in awhile!  It makes me feel all warm & fuzzy knowing that I can spark a good laugh now and then.  But, when the creative juices quit flowing... well, I don't want to let anyone down, so I haven't been blogging much lately.  We'll have no half-assed blogging around here!

Anyhue
I just watched House.  I didn't, wouldn't, watch House for a long time cause I thought House was a really, really big jerk, and all the episodes seemed to be the same.  But somehow in the past year I've found myself watching it a lot.  It just adds to the list of Doctor/Hospital shows I watch.  Ok, well, I guess the list is still at two.  I used to watch ER and Greys, then I watched Private Practise for a season and Greys, then I watched ER and Greys again because it was ERs last season, and now I watch Greys and House.   MY Point is: Have you ever noticed that there seems to be a complete and utter lack of visitors moping around at the bedside of the sick and/or dying patients?  The best they ever have is a crazy teenaged friend who disappears halfway through the episode, or a distraught parent who shows up at the end just in time to see the patient make a miraculous recovery.  I'm pretty sure, I expect that, should I ever end up in that situation, I'd have 20 people a day traipsing though to see me - friends & family, co-workers & clergy... it's exhausting just thinking about it!  So are we supposed to believe that everyone who show up at Seattle Grace, or Mercy West, or Chicago Hope, or where ever House works, is a friendless, orphaned, social outcast?  Or does it just cost too much to hire actors who are non-essential to the plot line?  Suffice to say, it bothers me that they don't have more people visiting patients on Dr shows.

And speaking of no good material, I've been poking around the idea of starting a little crafty project so I've been wandering around the fabric section of Walmart a lot, (completely lost and unsure where to start.  Do you buy fabric by the yard or by the metre??), and their selection SUCKS!!!

Abs of Steel

...is what I'm gonna have if this cough lasts for much longer!  I tell yeah, there are certain advantages to getting the flu!

Speaking of steel, I got a free download for my Wii the other day.  Somewhere along the way, Nintendo decided to charge $5 to download their internet channel on the Wii.  But now they've changed their minds, made the download free again, and have given everyone who had to pay the $5 a rebate.  The rebate comes in the form of being allowed to download one classic NES game for free.  Naturally, I picked 'BLADES OF STEEL'.  Woo!  Nothing says 'Canadian childhood' like a good ol' button-mashing hockey game!

Blades of Steel, turns out, was a front runner in video game engineering in its day.  It was one of the very first games to use voice sampling - a real voice in the game.  Who, in their best commentator voice, hasn't mimicked 'BLADES OF STEEL' when turning on the game; or just when thinking about the game for that matter?  You're probably saying it right now!  I'm not sure anyone ever really understood what the commentator said when you passed the puck, but it was awesome anyway!  "It's a pass!", "With the pass", "What the puck"... ?

I remember playing this game for hours and hours as a kid - always letting my older cousin beat me of course.  But every once in awhile the actual hockey game would get a little dull, so we'd just skate our players around the ice and intentionally bash them into each other in hopes to start a fight.  What other hockey game rewards the winning fighter by carting the losing fighter off to the penalty box??  Pure gold!

If you'd like to relive a little bit of the Nintendo Entertainment System nostalgia for yourself, You can right HERE.  Yay for the internet - Bringing all our childhood dreams to reality!

Halloweeny

It has been years, and years, and years, and years since I have watched my mother make homemade caramel corn.  huh.  It only ever happens at halloween.  I wonder what I'd have to do to convince her to make some again..?

Homemade caramel corn and brown sugar fudge - Used to have a whole pile of that after an evening of scouring the neighbourhood for candy.  ...never really my favourite, but my dad always appreciated it!

Do people even bother to give out the homemade stuff anymore?

Dear Mr Buckley

Alright, alright!  I know I've dragged out this Flu thing long enough.  Time to put the pig out of its misery and start blogging about other useless things again!  And I promise I will, right after I air my grievances with a stalwart cold medication company.

Mr Buckley did us all a tremendous favour when he took his terrible, awful, horrible, no good, really bad syrup in the brown bottle and turned it into cheery yellow pills.  Mr Buckley, I thank you from the bottoms of my toes!  But, why? Why? WHY?!  Did you take a great thing and make it mediocre?

I'm speaking of Buckley's Complete - Cough, Cold & Flu.  48 fun caplets to get you through your day.  Problem is, there are a whopping 36 caplets for daytime use (108hrs of relief), but only 12 nighttime caplets (36hrs of relief).  Now, isn't that a little bit like putting 12 in a package of weiners, but only 8 in a package of buns?  Marketers, I tell ya, they're all evil!

But it doesn't end there, oh no!  Here's the kicker:  The nighttime caplets are like pure gold!  They make you feel 100%!   Fever, aches & pains, headache, cough & sore throat, runny nose & sneezing, sinus & nasal congestion, itchy & watery eyes; they cover it all.  But they also make you sleepy, so it's best not to use them during the day.

The DAYTIME caplets.  Well!  They work alright, and they don't make you sleepy, but they're missing two important things off that list.  They don't stop the runny nose & sneezing, and they don't stop the itchy watery eyes.

Now I'm sure if you ask Mr Buckley why he did that he would either explain to you that it is scientifically proven to be helpful in the recovery process to let your nose run.  OR, he'd tell you that he did it so that you feel alright, but you still look like crap so your boss sends you home early and you can enjoy the rest of your day!

I have another theory though.  See, when I use a decongestant without something to stop the runny nose, my head turns into a snot factory; the ol' schnoz turns on like a regular faucet!  And what's right there beside me to clean up the mess?  Kleenex.

I bet old Mr Buckley there has shares in the Kleenex company!  ...whatajerk

Still Alive! ...mostly

I went to work today, which, maybe I shouldn't have done.  A lot of older people come into our office, and the guys frequently have to do hospital visitations...  But, I took the day off yesterday and I was so ridiculously bored that there was no way I could stay home again.  So I did my best to contain myself within my office and not talk to anyone.

Obviously, I'm not incredibly sick.  Certainly not sick enough to go sit around a crowded hospital ER with dozens of other sick people, and absolutely not even close to being sick enough to actually be tested for anything.

That leaves me with the internet.  :)  Oh, Google, how I waste so much time with you!

Well!  Did you know that the Ontario Ministry of Health has an Influenza Self-Assessment Tool??  With tools like this on the internet, who needs doctors!!   Four simple clicks of the mouse later and my result:  'You probably have influenza'  Woo!

Ok, ok, but... how reliable is this?  I mean, this is the same government that's only telling us to go get a flu shot.  Did you know that right here, today, people started lining up for a flu shot clinic TWO HOURS BEFORE IT OPENED!!!  What is the definition of 'terrorism' again?  Panic-stricken masses, what?

So... Let's skip over to a site that has only relevant and accurate tests: Facebook.  I'm sure I blocked a 'do you have swine flu' quiz just yesterday.   ...Ooh, Swine Flu Gifts!  Nice... Alright, back on track; this is research after all!  No time for fooling around.

Ok, here's one:  Do you have SWINE FLU?  The "know it all" diagnostic test to see if your snout is about to drop off!!  That sounds promising!  Plus, it has a cute little pig as the picture.  And the results: 'YES!!! You're fully blown!! -You ears are pussy pink, you have a snotty snout & your tail has lost its curl.... call dr porky immediately' 

Well, there you go!  The tests speak for themselves, you should probably stay away from me for a day or two.  And as always, sympathies and monetary gifts are more than welcome!

Goodnight, and don't let Karma kick you in the teeth on the way out the door!

So this morning I woke up with a headache for the second day in a row.  I thought the probable cause was dehydration because I haven't been drinking enough water lately. No big deal.  I can fix that.

I also took a breath and this cough from deep within my chest came out of nowhere.  Not really a surprise; I was sick as a dog with a sinus cold that moved to my chest a couple months ago and once in awhile the cough still comes back to get me.  Probably if I went out for a good long run I'd knock it out of my system for good.  (More likely, I would fall over gasping because I'm not a runner!)

And then I wrote that happy little essay about not caring to get an H1N1 shot (and not being able to get one even if I actually wanted one).  That's about the time when all the muscles in my back decided that they were going on strike and slowly just got more and more sore as the day went on.  That's also about the time I should have just packed it in and went home, but honestly, I really didn't feel all that sick so I stayed at work and coughed germs all over my computer.

And now I'm sitting here reading the Government of Canada flu propoganda I found in my mailbox.  Let's see...

Symptoms:
 (almost always)
- Sudden onset of cough and fever.  Check.

(common)
- Fatigue.  Not so much, not yet anyway.
- Muscle aches.  Check.
- Sore throat.  Not really, the cold was 1000x worse. Plus I've been dealing with sore wisdom teeth, which doesn't even compare!
- Headache.  Check.
- Decreased appetite.  Doesn't seem to be a problem. (Where's that bag of Smartfood?)
-Runny nose.  Yeah!  Wasn't expecting that to be on the list!

(sometimes)
- well... they're the nasty ones and I don't have any of those so, moving on

So THIS is what the flu feels like??  I've felt like this in the past.  Usually I pop a couple Advil and continue on my day.  For serious!  I don't feel all that sick right now, and I'm not even currently doped up on anything!   But this time around, everything you read is all like: STAY AT HOME!! Don't spread it around!!  I'm going to be bored out of my mind staying at home all day tomorrow!

On the plus side, I guess I don't need to worry about that H1N1 shot now! lol
Oh... and I guess I shouldn't help out at that church dinner tomorrow night... bummer... really upset about that one...
Maybe I'll write hourly blog updates tomorrow - I've got nothing better to do.  It'll be like a National Enquirer expose, something like Swine Flu: an Insider's Look! 

...

Anyway, if I have hooves for feet the next time you see me, you'll know what happened.

Cloudy with a 60% chance of swine flu

My mother asked me the other day if I had decided whether or not I'd be getting the flu shot this year.  Up to this point I've always passed on it and have miraculously survived 28 winter seasons thus far.  Upon replying that I didn't really plan on it, I received the look (complete with raised eyebrow) that only a mother can pull off.

*sigh*

My general feeling of the flu shot is that there is a lot of media hype full of scare tactics meant to frighten people into getting a vaccine for a virus that has already probably run its course and/or mutated long since the vaccine was produced, making it more or less ineffective and a giant waste of money.  The fact is that the seasonal flu shot is only effective against 2 or 3 flu strains each year and there are way more flu strains than that floating around in the air on a day to day basis.  ...Let alone the fact that no one really knows the long term effects of injecting the population with these vaccines - I've heard tell that there is actually mercury in one of the preservative ingredients in the vaccine.  Mmm... mercury.... 

I get it, alright?  I really do.  I understand why people who (a) are more susceptible to illnesses due to underlying medical conditions or (b) people who come into contact with large percentages of the populations (ie: health care professionals) would get the vaccines. 

And then there's H1N1.  Here piggy, piggy, piggy...  Did I hear right that they think that anyone who got last year's seasonal shot might actually be more susceptible to H1N1??  Smooth move there.  I really am sitting on the fence on this one.  There's just so much hype about it - they've almost got me brainwashed.  Plus, that look my mother gave me was just about enough for me to concede and just go get the stupid shot.  Until I read an article from yesterday's paper.

Turns out that they're  (you know, THEM - the smart ones) are expecting that this outbreak (epidemic, pandemic, whatever you want to call it) is going to peak in Grey Bruce within 2 weeks.  TWO WEEKS!!   The school system is already reporting upwards of 20% absentee rates at some schools; my boss already had to shave off his beard so that he can wear a mask properly when he visits the hospital; the hospital has already confirmed 14 cases - and they only test for it if you've got the symptoms AND have to stay in the hospital overnight.  Well guess what kids?  We haven't even received our first shipment of the vaccine to this area yet.  It's not expected to arrive until later this week  (it must have to be shipped by camel from Siberia or something - so much for FedEx!).

*GASP!! IT'S HERE AND WE HAVE NO WAY TO PROTECT OURSELVES!!*   Remember that movie 'Outbreak' about the monkeys and that virus? They just about nuked that town!  We're all doomed!

By the way, when the first batch of it does arrive in the area, it's going straight to old people and health care professionals.  A young healthy person like me isn't even going to have a chance to get vaccinated before it peaks anyway.  I couldn't get vaccinated right now even if I wanted to!

Man!  I feel like I'm living on the edge!

...Is it warm in here?



-----------


Addendum:

Something I have learned in my time surfing the internet is that it is common practise in forums, (those pages and pages of useless editorial knowledge and comments buried in the basement of the internet), to type in blue text when one is trying to convey a sense of sarcasm.  I should probably just start writing in blue text all the time.  For those of you who are new to these pages, or who do not know me very well, I tend to write with tongue firmly planted in cheek 85% of the time.

So, no, I don't actually think we're all doomed. 
Wash your hands.  And if you feel sick, stay away from me. 
End of story.

Where's the sizing chart in this thing?

You know when you were a kid and you spent hours on end at this time of year looking through the Sears Christmas Wish Book drooling over all the awesome toys?  Man!  There was always that one way cool thing that you just had to have!

But then after you pined over it for months on end, and you begged and pleaded with Santa to bring it to you, and you woke up on at 4am on Christmas morning just so you could get that first glimpse of it before you accidentally woke your father up and he sent you back to bed, well, it just wasn't all it was cracked up to be.

For starters, Santa brought it in the wrong colour.  Then, of course, it was actually smaller than it looked in the picture.  And you actually cut your finger on that stupid made-in-china plastic.  And to top it off: "batteries not included".

*sigh*  You start to realize that shopping through catalogues isn't all it's cracked up to be.  Remember that old National Film Board carton about the little french kid who needs a new hockey jersey?  Out comes the old Eaton's catalogue.  The kid does get a new sweater, but.... let's just say it doesn't exactly fit.

You know what I find to be pretty much exactly the same, (read: disappointing), as shopping through catalogues?  Online dating websites.

You know what I'm really starting to consider doing?  Walking over there to that church across the street and asking the pastor to introduce me to all the single guys around my age.   For serious.  Come on!  There's gotta be 400 or more people in that congregation, there must be at least one single guy my age!

Like I was saying...

But really... what's the point of giving up the luxury?  Denying luxury because you feel guilty about it?  Doesn't God want us to enjoy the gifts He has given us?

Ugh... so many questions.  I guess I'll know the answers when I'm dead.

Google gods

Let me paint a picture for you:

Early evening, lounging on the chesterfield (that's Canada-speak for 'sofa' or 'couch'), watching a movie 6ft wide projected on the wall, cellphone an arm's length away just in case someone (anyone) sends a text, latest video game console doing it's thing over in the corner, and laptop busily surfing the net.

That's a lot of technological luxury for one person.  And, arguably, all of it completely unnecessary.  Not one bit of it helps me achieve, or succeed, or anything really.  Actually, most of the time it's all more just a giant time-filler/waster than anything else.

And then it happened.  The laptop just shut off.  Completely dead.  I wasn't even touching it at the time, so it wasn't something I did.  Wouldn't respond to the power button either.  Dead.  No lights, no warnings, no nothing.  Dead.  Fears of terrible viruses and expensive repair bills floated through my head. 

But I remained calm and did what any self respecting geek would do.  I hooked the video game system up to the internet and Googled the problem.  Had it fixed in 10 minutes.

The whole thing made me think about how 'in excess' our lives are.  How much STUFF we have and fill our lives with, but we really don't need any of it.  Don't get me wrong, I don't want to give up any of it.  The Amish gave up technology some 200 years ago and look where that got them!

Blaugh.  I donno... Sometimes I just think about how friggen lucky we are to have been born & raised in a place like Canada and how different my life could have been had I been born anywhere else.  Is that just a roll of the dice happenstance thing, or was there a reason I was born into the life of blue collar sloth while the next kid was born into a 3rd World war zone?  And what is my responsibility to that kid?  Do I have a responsibility?  Or am I just supposed to sit back and enjoy what I've got?

The whole thing hurts my head.
And then I found this:

Kite Runner

I have owned a copy of The Kite Runner for probably close to a year but have never watched it until now.  I knew it was a fairly intense movie with subtitles, and you've just gotta be in the right mood to watch a movie like that.

Wow.
Really, that's all I've got right now.  Wow.  If you haven't seen it, do.  It's excellent.


The story is a lot of things, but mostly it's about friendship & loyalty.  One of my favourite scenes is right at the beginning and goes like this:

(Hassan & Amir are the 2 boys in the story and in their spare time they like to fight kites.  They're having a chat while they're waiting for a loose kite to float down to them)

H: It's coming.
A: How do you know?
H: I know.
A: How can you know?
H: Would I ever lie to you?
A: I don't know. Would you?
H: I'd rather eat dirt.
A: Really? You'd do that?
H: Do what?
A: Eat dirt if I told you to.
H: ...If you asked me to I would.

Throughout the story Hassan is fiercely loyal to Amir and repeatedly does things for Amir simply because he is his best friend.  Amir isn't quite as loyal a friend but, of course, pulls through in the end.

But the question is would you eat dirt* for your friend?
I admit, I wouldn't eat dirt for just anybody.  But yeah, I'm pretty lucky and I've got a few pretty great friends whom I would eat dirt for, if they asked me to (and sometimes even when they don't ask me, but I know they need me to).  Why?  Because that's what friends do for each other.  And it makes my heart happy to help a friend.


Just watch the movie.  Or read the book, I'm sure it's good too.


*we're not actually talking about dirt here you know.  It's one of those tricky metaphor things.

Jesus is my Saviour, not you.

You can typically count on prime-time TV to not have anything very constructive to say about Christianity. But every so often those TV writers manage to pull something out of their socks that actually hits the nail on the head. And I smile a happy smile and think 'yeah'.

So when my favourite show, Grey's, sticks up for Jesus - double 'yeah'.

Who knows how long this video will actually remain on youtube, but for now, here's the clip I'm talking about (find the scene at 0:38 - 2:27)




I thank God every day that it's not my job to judge whether homosexuality is right or wrong. Honestly, I think there are more important things in this world that we should be concerned about - poverty, social justice, spreading a message of love, mercy & grace, etc, etc, etc.

The winds of Christianity have been changing (very, very slowly) for quite some time, but they are changing. I think, I hope, that people are starting to realize that we don't live in a black & white world, it's a full spectrum of grey - No. Not grey. Technicolor is a much better description; every colour imaginable.

Not one of us is free from doing something wrong or incredibly stupid once in awhile. And there will always be those instances where one person sees a sinful action, and yet another person sees the same thing as just a daily part of life. Our 'kids duking it out on the schoolyard' mentality often never really goes away - the issues we deal with just get more complicated as we grow older. Rather than getting all uppity and drawing lines in the sand over such actions, wouldn't it be better for us all to approach life with a little grace and understanding?

"You're supposed to love me no matter what, that's what a parent does." Our actions aren't always right, but they are always, always overshadowed by God's overwhelmingly abundant love for each and every one of us.

Abandon Ship!

I've been spending some time lately writing a fairly lengthy blog about this biblical verse:

Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness? What harmony is there between Christ and Belial? What does a believer have in common with an unbeliever? ~2 Corinthians 6: 14-15 NIV

And this one:

To the rest I say this (I, not the Lord): If any brother has a wife who is not a believer and she is willing to live with him, he must not divorce her. And if a woman has a husband who is not a believer and he is willing to live with her, she must not divorce him. For the unbelieving husband has been sanctified through his wife, and the unbelieving wife has been sanctified through her believing husband. Otherwise your children would be unclean, but as it is, they are holy.

But if the unbeliever leaves, let him do so. A believing man or woman is not bound in such circumstances; God has called us to live in peace. How do you know, wife, whether you will save your husband? Or, how do you know, husband, whether you will save your wife? ~ 1 Corinthians 7:12-16 NIV

And how, even though they're written (presumably) by the same guy (Paul) to the same church (in Corinth), they seem to contradict each other.

But... It started to feel a lot like homework. The further I dug, the more research I had to do. It was becoming very long and essay-like, and not very fun anymore. Sometimes you just need to know when to quit.

I'll let you draw your own conclusions.

But if serving the LORD seems undesirable to you, then choose for yourselves this day whom you will serve, whether the gods your forefathers served beyond the River, or the gods of the Amorites, in whose land you are living. But as for me and my household, we will serve the LORD." ~ Joshua 24:15 NIV

The Armstrong Family Thanksgiving Post-Show

Act 1. 'Feats of Strength'
It started with a wrestling match: me vs a 6 year old, a 4 year old, and a 3 year old. All at once. To the death. Well, not to the death, but when you've got 3 little boys sitting on your head, it sort of feels like death. The match ended when we all got in trouble for causing a ruckus.

Act 2. 'Hey I bet you can't do this weird and slightly disgusting body contortion!'
Double jointed fingers; touch your toes; twist up your fingers; the splits; lay on the floor on your back and put your knees on the floor beside your ears; put your big toe in your ear. What? I can do it, can't you?

Act 3. 'How'd you do that??'
First off, put your arms straight out in front of you, palms facing outwards. Cross your arms and link your fingers. Bring your linked fingers in towards your chin. Now, without uncrossing your fingers, put your pointer fingers on the sides of your nose. Uncross your arms without moving your fingers off your nose.
My dad's got this 'broken arm' trick he's been doing since I was a little kid. I've never in my life seen a child's eyes get so big - they were blown away!

Act 4. 'Remember when?'
When I was but a child, I thought like a child, I acted like a child, and I could sit on the floor with my feet straight out in front of me, put my hands on the floor, lift myself up, and swing back and forth. It was a pretty cool trick, and all my older cousins would put in requests to see it on a regular basis. I can no longer pick my heals up off the ground; I blame it on the long legs, but the truth is that it's a lack of core muscles.
We thought it would be a great idea to teach all the little kids this amazing trick, but they didn't really grasp the concept. That's when the betting began! My Big Wheel cousin (who is 5 years older than me) bet his sister that HE could do it. Things were going well for him, it looked like he might just be successful, when there was an earsplitting scream of pain as his thigh cramped up! It was possibly the single-most funniest thing to ever happen at a Thanksgiving dinner. Until he did it again, twice.
Of course, this spurred on other guys to give it a try and the competition was on! This resulted in more screams of pain as more legs cramped up, and tears of laughter filled the room. My dad was the only one to do the trick with any success (and without hurting himself). He did it again the next day just to prove that it wasn't a fluke.
Now, my solitary goal in life is to come out of retirement and to be able to do this trick again. We'll see how that goes.

Act 5. 'Amusement with string'
It's really amazing what you can do with a single piece of string. Cat's Cradle, Jacob's Ladder, those are standards. I'm not sure where in the world my dad picked up all his tricks, but he can also pull a string through his fingers, to the amazement of all the under 5's in the room. And if you really want to entertain a kid for hours, just put a button on the string! Another cool string trick was performed by the 2 year old in the room: swinging it around her head, the yo-yo on the end of her string clunked the 3 year old in the head! Fun times had by all!

So that's pretty standard Armstrong Family gathering entertainment. We should really charge admission - we put on a pretty great show!

Just Friends.

Again.
Story of my life.
Hey! Friends are good to have right?!

At the risk of my Aunt Marg taking this news and bringing it up at the Thanksgiving dinner table this weekend (love you Aunt Marg!)... I'm going to talk about it anyway:

A few of you know, most of you don't, that about 6 months ago I met a guy on an online dating website (lame! I know. And I said I'd never do that too.). And we spent a lot of time emailing back & forth and getting to know each other. Super nice guy! Local, hard working Dutch farm boy, involved in his church, drives a pickup truck, and not bad lookin' either!

(I can pretty much say whatever I want about him cause he doesn't read this!)

You know.... there's always that glimmer of hope that something is actually going to work out in your favour. And I was really hoping that this time might be it!

I've met him. Real live, in the flesh - and he looks like his picture! We've gone out a few times (more than 3, less than 6). That's hard to explain too... What exactly is the correct term to use when you're going out on dates with a guy, but you're not actually dating him? What is the word for that? Uncommitted? :P

Anyway, things have been going painfully slow, and pretty much stalled out there a few weeks ago. Lack of 'spark', as some wise person put it. So we've had the "you know what, this isn't actually working, let's just be friends and if sometime in the distant future we both lose our memories and forget how awkward this was, maybe something magical will happen and we'll get that spark and live happily ever after, but until then, we're just friends" talk.

So, back to square one.
Umm... yeah.

I just keep repeating, "dating is awkward, but so is becoming the crazy cat lady, dating is awkward..."

I'm joking. You know that, right? I'm allergic to cats, otherwise I'd have 6 by now.

I've been reading a lot of 1 Corinthians over the past 12 hours or so. That Apostle Paul guy really pushes the 'it's better to stay single and live for God' thing...

I need sleep.
:D

Typical Day at the Office

Not too much out of the ordinary today.

Went to work
Was late. Again. I'll blame it on construction.
Checked some email
Wrote some cheques
Shuffled some papers
Looked important at my desk
Took a phone call or two
Helped put a giant post in a hole
Helped cement the post in the ground
Carried around a 4ft level for awhile
Traded the level for a shovel for awhile
Did a bit of computer work
Mailed some letters

Yup. Pretty normal day.

All I have to say is that it's a good thing I was wearing blue jeans and not a pair of dress pants because somehow I got covered in mud.

fkwalksdjf!!

To. I am going TO do the dishes.
Two. I have TWO plates to wash.
Too. I put TOO many bubbles in the water.

There. I am going over THERE.
Their. THEIR car is blocking my driveway.
They're. THEY ARE going to move the car.

Where. WHERE are you going today?
Were. We WERE at the zoo.
We're. WE ARE going to take the bus.
Ware. That store sells plenty of WARES.
Wear. I'll WEAR shorts, thanks.

Weather. Have you seen the WEATHER? It is supposed to rain all week.
Whether. We'll go on vacation WHETHER or not it rains.

Its. The cat licked ITS paw.
It's. IT IS a beautiful night to save lives.
(admittedly, I get lazy and drop the comma in 'it's' frequently - but when push comes to shove, I do know how to use it (its, it's) properly)

Bare. The cupboards are bare.
Bear. I can't bear to see you're incredibly poor grammar skills any longer!

Your. YOUR car is in my way.
You're. YOU ARE not going to like what I'm planning to do about it.


GAHHH
Seriously, I am deeply concerned about our future generations' writing skills.
Of course, if you're reading this, your writing skills are most likely just fine. Maybe I should post this to Facebook...

Oooh Shiny!

I don't have tv, well, I mean, I have a tv, I just don't get any tv channels on it, so I end up watching too much YouTube.

Now, there's a lot of crap on YouTube, I should know... I'm responsible for some of it. But, there is also some decent entertainment to be found as well. One YouTube channel I've stumbled upon is Take180.com. They do a lot of parodies and movie spoofs and things. Pair that with my love of Harry Potter and you get this:




If you're looking for even more Harry Potter fun, you could check out 'A Very Potter Musical'. It's a musical written and performed by a bunch of college students with too much time on their hands. It's 23 videos in all and runs about 1 1/2 hours or so. I like it a lot. It's totally awesome.

Uhh... sure?

I went out to Joe Tomato's and to the movies tonight with Fr Dave and another guy from work. Cool beans. Didn't have anything better to do anyway, and the new Bruce Willis movie is pretty good (which is always a bonus).

We were sitting around waiting for our food to arrive and Fr Dave (he's my boss) says 'You still do youth stuff with your church?'

Well, no, I don't. Youth don't exist in my church. We pulled the plug on the youth group a couple years ago because we were quickly running out of interested kids and, quite frankly, I was suffering from burnout.

Anyhue, he looks at me and says 'Wanna go to World Youth Day?'

Gotta say, I wasn't expecting that one.

'Umm... where is it?'

'Madrid. 2011. We need chaperons.'

Uh... Sure. I think I can handle a 9 day trip to SPAIN.

I caught a fish with my bare hands

And it was THIS big!

Serious.

I did.

I did a lot this weekend. It was a really great weekend.

Start it off with about 3 hours of Apples to Apples with some great company on a Friday night.

A trip to the village at Blue Mountain to wander around the shops, ride the gondola, and walk back down the ski hill.

A pit stop at the local hotel to 'use the washroom'. Weird that the washrooms were through the main lobby, down the hall, and up the elevator?? Hahaha! SURPRISE!!! We're actually checking in for a fun girls night! Sometimes guys do things that are amazing! (I should really get me one of my own! lol)

Hotel room had EVERYTHING you could dream of! Ah, the wonders of double headed showers!

Good friends, good conversation, good wine.

Chinese food for lunch. Mmmm.

Too much food in general.

And a fun adventure down the river from Inglis Falls to Harrison Park which resulted in me actually picking up a rather large salmon out of the water just for fun! (Shh, don't tell anyone cause we were in a no fishing area and they're spawning) I won't say it was the highlight of my weekend, but it was rather unexpected and kind of Survivor Man-ish. Somewhere there is a goofy picture of me holding a big fish.

Oh, ps, A super humongous congratulations to Shannon & Mike. Mr Mike carried a ring around with him all weekend (I was wondering why he sort of looked like he was going to puke half the weekend). He did finally get the permission he was waiting for, and asked the girl he loves to marry him. Bonus - she said YES!! Congrats guys! Love you both. :)

Grey's :(

I kinda sorta absolutely love Grey's Anatomy and have been counting down the days until the season premier on Thursday for awhile now. Yes, it's even in my Google calendar.

But I don't have TV. I can't pick up any television reception where I live, and I'm too cheap for cable.

No problem though! That's what God made the internet for! I just venture over to one of my favourite sites: www.watch.ctv.ca, and voila! TV at my fingertips! ...A day late mind you, but at least its there!

Except.... IT'S NOT THERE!!!

!!!!

I donno, maybe ABC revoked CTV's permission to air it online or something. The point is IT'S NOT THERE! GAH!! And of course, you've gotta be in the great US of A to watch ABC online.

And then, I was warned - Do NOT watch the sneak peak, it will completely ruin the episode for you! And yet somehow today I managed to hit a wrong button and before I could scramble to make it stop, I had found out (absolutely the way I did not want to find out) which of the characters actually dies. It ruined my life for the next 5 minutes. *sigh*

Options...
Hope CTV is just messing with us and it'll be posted to the website on Friday like it should be.

Spend every Thursday begging my friend up the street to invite me over so I can watch it on her massive flatscreen :D

Download it *GASP* from a P2P website & risk getting a virus, or worse, end up in JAIL! ooh

Find a website to stream it from and still apparently risk catching a virus, but at least I don't have to waste my time downloading it. So far, the best I can find is: tvshack.net

Or... find an anonymous US proxy so that the ABC website can't tell I'm from Canada and stream it from there. I barely understand what that means, so I'm not sure its a good option.

Or... give up Grey's???? Hahaha... No. Not an option.

So... What are YOU doing Thursday night?

RIP Hip-Hop 1978-2009

It is the end of a rather short lived era; after a mere 31 year existence as a music genre, Hip Hop has died.

In a strange set of circumstances involving Hip Hop artist Kanye West, country music artist Taylor Swift, and President of the United States Barack Obama, it is unclear who is to blame for the untimely death of the Hip Hop music genre.

As the young country music sensation Taylor Swift humbly collected her MTV Video award for Best Female Video last week, a reckless Kanye West stormed the stage, ripping the microphone out of the confused Swift's hand along the way, and with his cutting words effectively sliced Hip Hop's wrists in front of a concert hall of onlookers.

Much like The Fonz jumping the shark as the TV series 'Happy Days' painfully dwindled to an end, is the desperate act of an artist looking for attention too much for Hip Hop fans to take? Or did Country kill the Hip Hop star? There is much to speculate about this odd event. Was it a botched murder attempt on the life of Country Music? After all, what right does Country Music have to be at the MTV Video awards anyway? Or was it a Hip Hop suicide attempt in front of thousands of onlookers? Some believe that Beyonce isn't as innocent as she lets on and was actually the brains behind the operation. Possibly West was a casualty of war, a used pawn in an unseen battle between competing female artists. We may never know the reason behind his actions, but as West left the stage after his rampage, Hip Hop was left a mangled mess, a mere fragment of it's former self; beaten, bloodied, and shamed in front of the entire world.

Enter the President of the United States, Barack Obama. As the leader of a free nation, it is in the President's best interest to remain impartial to the entertainment industry, never taking sides in the ongoing genre wars. Obama is a different kind of president though, firmly putting his foot down and letting the nation know where he stands. "That was totally inappropriate", remarked Obama as he casually rested his hand on Hip Hop's life support after the incident. "He's a jackass", were the last words Hip Hop heard as the President pulled the plug on the genre forever.

So long Hip Hop; to those who were paying attention to your short life, you'll be missed. For the rest of us, this incident will surely be used as a stepping stone for Country Music's rise to the top. Domination of all musical genres by Country Music is on the horizon. Look out Show Tunes, you're next!


------------

Videos of this event are being removed from YouTube right left and centre. 'copyright laws' pfft. Those that remain typically have the embedding function disabled. Here is a link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1z8gCZ7zpsQ

Killarney Day 8 - Saturday Aug 15/09

Even though we did absolutely nothing all day yesterday, we were still all in bed by about 10:20.


I had suggested that we try to get up early and do the bulk of our hiking before the intense heat of the day, so somehow, I felt responsible to make sure we got up at a decent hour. I woke up at 6:30; everyone was up by about 7am. And, miracle of miracles: we were ready to hit the trail at 8:30!


Today was a grey and damp day, but still remarkably hot. We're all very glad that the sun is hidden behind the clouds.


We had expected today to be a relatively flat and easy hiking day; it was not. In fact, it was one of the most challenging. Lots of little ups and downs, and plenty of slippery and loose rocks to trip on, it was hard on the knees and feet, and made for a long morning.


Everyone's getting pretty tired, and there has been mutterings of just walking out today and going home depending on what time we arrive at our campsite (we also don't want to have to drive all night after a long day of hiking just to get home when we've got a perfectly good site to use).


Some easier trail, a quicker pace, afternoon rain, and a campsite in a swamp sealed the deal - we're walking out and going home today. Back to civilization! We're all in agreement that 8 days in the woods is a little too much of a good thing.


Made it to George Lake Campground at about 3:30 after hiking across 'The Ridge', down 'The Crack', and around George Lake itself. Once again, very stunning views; even the mist couldn't hide that.


Got cleaned up a bit and left the park at around 4pm, somewhat disappointed that we hadn't seen anything larger than a porcupine during our 8 days in the wilderness. Not 10 minutes out of the park a black bear runs across the highway 300m in front of the van! Josh slowed down at the point where he crossed the road, but we didn't really expect to see the bear because of the pace he had been moving at. But there he was standing on the top of a rock outcrop, lifting a rock that had to weigh over 100lbs with one paw and tossing it aside like it was nothing! It's unfortunate that we saw this while driving by at 60km/hr, and there are no pictures to prove it. :(


Got to Huntsville at around 7:30 to pick up my car, and then we went our separate ways. I arrived home at about 10:30, tired and sore, but with plenty of stories to tell!


All in all, it was a good trip! It's a great experience to be out in the wilderness with no one else around; silent and peaceful, gorgeous views, cooking over fire, watching the sun rise... However, I feel that my hiking days are numbered and I have no intentions of doing a trip that long again. I think that my hiking boots will remain buried in the closet for quite awhile (at least until the current blisters heal and the feeling returns to my toes).

Thus endeth the tale of four friends hiking in Killarney Provincial Park.

Killarney Day 7 - Friday Aug 14/09

VACATION DAY!!!

We got up this morning at a leisurely 9am and Heather made us pancakes for breakfast.

It is a beautiful hot and sunny day; a great day for laundry and napping and splashing around in the water! (It actually would have been awful to hike anywhere today in this heat! I wonder what the temp is?? Easily the hottest day of this summer anyway.)

We have a beautiful warm breeze up here on the hill. Perfect for doing laundry really. It'll be nice to wear a shirt that doesn't smell like smoke for a change. It was also nice to finally wash our hair for the first time in about 5 days too.

Not much else going on. We had some lunch, are sitting around soaking up the sun, tried to find some blueberries for bannock tonight (no luck, the bears have already cleaned up this patch). I think I'll take my camera and go for a walk.


I feel as if I got a little too much sun (and yes, I did use sunscreen).

Big bannock dinner tonight. Then, just hanging by the fire reading a book.

We want to try for an early morning tomorrow. 12km to hike.
Then, 2km on Sunday.
Then, HOME!
I'm ready to come out of the woods now.

Killarney Day 6 - Thursday Aug 13/09

Well, I had a decent sleep last night (as decent as can be expected anyway - considering that every part of my body I try to lay on seems to be bruised). That is, until about 3:30am when a loon made its terrible sound. They are not peaceful creatures. And then I woke up realizing I was starving.

Such is life I suppose. We're not really consuming very many more calories than I would in an average day, but we're doing some pretty strenuous hiking for 6 or 8 hours a day. Luckily we have lots of snack food to fill the gaps between meals. But at 3:30 in the morning, all that food is tied up in a tree and there's no way I'm getting up to get any!

I woke up again at 5am and had a pretty restless sleep until 6am when we all got up. It still took us 2 hours to have breakfast, pump water, and pack things up. After watching a very pretty sunrise over the lake, and realizing that it was going to be a very long and hot day, we left our site at 8am. By 8:30am we had already climbed to the top of our first mountain of the day.

A quick hour-long 3km hike got us to the base of the mountain we've been both looking forward to, and dreading, for a week. Always a visible point in the distance, we were now ready to tackle the 1.7km climb to the summit of Silver Peak. At 589m in elevation, it is the tallest mountain in the La Cloche mountain range and a good 140m higher than any other peak we've climbed in the park.

We set up a tent at the bottom of the trail for Deanne (she had made it clear that she was not coming with us) and left all our gear with her. Josh & Heather and I made it to the top in about 50 minutes (we were on a time limit, so we were trying to go as quickly as possible without giving me a heart attack). Challenge-wise, its a well used trail, popular with both hikers and canoers and people of all ages. Other than being an uphill walk for an hour, its a much easier hike than I had been expecting.

Pretty great 360 degree view of the entire mountain range from the top. We spent a lot of time wandering around and taking a ton of pictures. There's a spot marked out at the top where a fire tower once stood and something written on the rocks which isn't quite legible anymore dated May 1955.



We boogied down the hill in about half an hour, re-packed our things, and walked another 3km to site H38 for lunch on Silver Lake. Its not a site I'd want to stay at - beautiful lake with a stunning white rock outcrop on the far side, but poor water access and very little privacy being that it's right on the trail (a lot of the other sites are quite a way off the trail. Sometimes you have to walk half a kilometre or more off the main trail to your site). 9km of hiking before lunch today! That's more ambitious than I am most days, that's for sure!

After lunch... tired, uber heat from the sun, sore toes & blisters, and stiff joints from sitting for an hour, and a lot of annoying uphill/downhills, made for a pretty silent afternoon on the trail. I fell pretty far behind for awhile. My knees just won't bend as quickly as the others, and I seem to be the one left huffing & puffing halfway up most of the hills. They say a group can only hike as fast as the slowest person. That would be me.

I have learned that I like being out in lead setting the pace because, believe it or not, on certain terrain (especially the open rocky stuff) I can actually gain some ground over the rest. Being in the lead also means that I get to see every new sight first!

But then the uphills or rooty woods trails start and I fall behind again. It doesn't bother me to fall to the back of the pack because I don't like to feel like I'm holding everyone up; I'm also not a fan of having anyone follow me so closely that I feel like I have a shadow. Not picky, am I? :P But I really don't like it when I fall so far behind that I can neither see nor hear the people ahead of me. I know they'll wait for me at their next break, but I always feel utterly abandoned. Severe pychological fear? Maybe. Go ahead, analyze away.

Anyhue... In my grumpy left-behind state, I at least got to see a moose track. That counts for something, right? Six days and no moose sightings. That's disapointing.

The afternoon was HOT but we just kept tramping along, taking breaks whenever we found a cool shady spot. Considering we had 13.7km (plus the Silver Peak trail for a total of 17km) to hike for the day and figured we'd be eating our supper on the trail before finding our campsite, we made really good time and actually got to our campsite around 5:30pm.

Site H47 - Heaven Lake. This is to be our home for the next two nights as we are taking tomorrow off and doing absolutely nothing - we ARE on vacation after all!

Heaven Lake has been a source of conversation for a day or so. What will we find at Heaven Lake?? A nice turquoise blue lake with a great swimming spot? Pizza? A cooler of beer? A Jacuzzi Tub? A campsite paved in gold? Ok... so our expectations were a little unreal, but man! A beer would be great!

Heaven Lake is NOT as the name implies. It's nice... I sorta like it actually, but it's a dinky little pond with not much for good swimming as the bottom is covered in gross green weedy slimy stuff, and we had some trouble getting space to set up 2 tents, AND we can't find a bathroom box. BOO. Not to mention that there's not much firewood around. So, heavenly, not really.

It gets its name from the view. Heaven Lake is at a higher elevation than the other lakes. It is a mountain lake. Right behind our site, across the main trail, is a lookout over a very pretty valley and lake much further below us. Heaven Lake is in fact IN the heavens.

Cheesy broccoli rice for supper followed by a big bowl of Dorito crumbs (they don't pack well, but they sure do taste good!). It's a lazy evening. We're all exhausted and don't really want to move let alone do the usual campsite stuff we should be doing. Been sitting around a campfire for awhile now. Stars are out nice and bright. Probably should get things cleaned up and head to bed. It's already well past our usual bedtime at 10:30 GASP! We really do need to get lots of rest so that we can do ABSOLUTELY NOTHING TOMORROW!!! yay!