Done and done.

I typically dislike Christmas.  Well, ok, it's not Christmas I dislike, it's the gift-giving anxiety leading up to Christmas.  You know:

"Oh, it's December, I should think about gifts.  I wonder what everyone wants."
"December 10th?  Plenty of time still - which is good... cause I have no clue what to get anyone..."
"December 15th.  Crap, crap, crap!  10 days... I hate shopping when the mall is so busy!"
"December 20th.  It's making me sick just thinking about it!  3 gifts to go, 4 shopping days left, and too much stuff to do between now and then!"
"December 24th.  Well... I guess this will have to do.  Hope they like it "  :S
"December 25th.  Oh man, no!  Don't open that one yet!  (I don't think he's going to like it...)  GAH!  I HATE CHRISTMAS!!! IT'S TOO STRESSFUL!"
"December 26th.  Ah... Everything worked out great, and it's all over for another year!  Where did the time go?"

AND THAT is why I don't like Christmas.  But this year!  This year is different!  This year, I'm going relax, and enjoy!  You know why?

BECAUSE I AM FINISHED ALL OF MY CHRISTMAS SHOPPING!!!

That's right!  I am finished ALL of my Christmas Shopping on November 30!  I do believe that this is the first time I have ever finished my present buying before December 20th!  Heck!  It's probably the first time I've ever STARTED my Christmas shopping before December 20th!

Is it disgusting?  Well, yeah, a little bit.  But, no gift buying anxiety this year!  No pressure, no last minute hasty decisions.  And you won't see me waiting in line at those ridiculously long checkouts like a sucker.

So let me be the first to say:
MERRY CHRISTMAS!!

One Year

Well, it's official.  I've been living on my own, in my own place, for exactly one whole year.

It's been good.
It's probably been good FOR me.
...It's been hard on my bank account though.  :)

I was concerned before I moved out that I'd be lonely on my own.
(But I also knew that I couldn't stand living with anyone else!  That's a great way to ruin a good friendship - not that I have many friends up here anyway.  YOU GUYS HAVE ALL MOVED AWAY ON ME!!)

Lonely hasn't been a problem.

When I think about a year, 365 days, it's not that long.  Days turn into weeks pretty fast, and before you know it, tomorrow's the first day of December one year later!

But I've managed to jam a lot of stuff into this past year.  It's been a good one.

Look out below!!

Ugh... So, it's that time of year again - time to put the snow tires on.  Tomorrow actually.  Woo.

On the plus side, I do not need to purchase tires, nor do I have to pay to have them changed.  Did you know Canadian Tire has a deal like that?  Purchase their tires (which are cheaper than at the dealership anyway) and they'll change 'em spring & fall for you.

Now, I used to store my tires at the farm, in the barn.  And every year I'd get a lecture about how 'those tires better not be ready for the dump, cause I'm not paying to take your tires to the dump!!'.  No Pa, if these tires got thrown out on me, I'd be mighty sad because they're pretty much new...

But now that I have my own place with SO MUCH closet space, (as my Ma frequently reminds me as she hands me things she thinks I should be responsible for storing), I just keep my tires here.  Saves my car from smelling like barnyard twice a year.

So... Tonight's job was to dig them out of the closet.  Not a simple task, what with a year's worth of empties and recycling in the way; and folding chairs, and table boards, and window screens, and a vacuum...

Now I have 4 tires sitting in the middle of my kitchen which need to be carried down a flight of stairs and put in the trunk of my car.  Did I mention that they're already on rims?  The things weigh about a thousand pounds a piece!!

I'm considering tossing them out my living room window and hoping that they don't bounce and roll onto the street below.

Ka-Ching!

I was in a casino the other night. 
For the first time in my life.
The colours and flashing lights and noises were overwhelming to me.
I wanted to leave the second I walked in the door.
It was midnight, and there was still an overabundance of white-haired people sitting around.
I had a toonie in my pocket, but it stayed there.
I just couldn't throw good money into a useless slot machine.
It was the first time I've ever shown my ID just to use a washroom.
Speaking of, there were hazardous waste containers,in every stall, full of used needles.
Gross.
And that was my five minute casino tour.

False advertising gets us sent to hell now?

So, now the WePray website has turned into an advertisment for a real videogame about Dante's Inferno and the sixth circle of hell or something.  All legitimately backed by EA Games.

The advertising, if you so chose to read it, (I wouldn't bother - the game looks like poo to me), says something to the effect that performing Mass without a priest present and on unconsecrated ground (ie: playing the 'WePray' game in your living room) is heretical and you will burn in hell for it.


Gee... they got us good there

WePray.... *sigh*

So...  Easter 2010: The exciting new video game so you don't have to wait for Sunday to go to church!




Umm...  A lot could be said about this.

Is it a fake?  Probably.  They do have a website, and they have sent press releases to videogaming websites for publicity.  But... Yeah, I'm sure it's fake.   ...the fact that it isn't being advertised for use on any specific video game console sort of gives it away.  (Also, there isn't any contact information on the website.)  But I must say, it's a very well executed fake!

So... Reaction?

• Well, the anti-Christians are all saying WTF!! GARBAGE!  !@!))@#& Stupid hillbilly Christians think they're so smart. !#)@!!@;#$^  This is exactly why I'll never be a !@!#$#% Christian.
  
• The laid back mainstream Christians are quietly laughing to themselves because it totally pokes fun of Catholics.  (And some of them probably even want to play it just for kicks.)
  
• And the hardcore Catholics, who think that this is the answer to getting their kids out of purgatory faster, are going to be some disappointed when they find out it's not real!

My take on it?  I was amused; they put a lot of thought into this 'game'!   ...of course, I like the movie 'Saved' too.  I guess I'm just one of those laid back mainstream Christians who doesn't mind poking fun at my own beliefs once in awhile.  I mean, seriously, I own a Miracle Jesus Action Figure (with glow in the dark hands)!

There will always be people who will take a joke too far, and there will always be people who take things far too seriously.   I don't think this is anything to get your underpants in a knot over.  And at the end of the day, I think God probably has the greatest sense of humour of all of us.  And that, my friends, is a good thing!


(The website says that pre-orders can be placed starting tomorrow - I guess we'll find out then if this is a hoax or not)

Compassion

Someone I know just posted this video to Facebook.
I think it goes well with my James Loney spiel

Julie Nunes

Have you seen this girl?

The Uke playing sensation on YouTube?

I think she's someone I'd like to know.  She'd be fun to have around.

James Loney

James Loney is in town tonight.  He spoke on violence begetting more violence at a high school this afternoon, and tonight he's speaking at a local church about the war in Afghanistan and alternative ways to make progress in that country.  He has every right to speak of such things, being that he was kidnapped in that country and held captive for 118 days back in 2005. 

I thought about going, I could have gone, perhaps I should have gone.  But... I didn't particularly want to go by myself and I didn't really know about it in time to invite anyone along.  Mike from Regina couldn't get his teleporter to mesh with his warp drive or something like that; Emmerson wouldn't go due to a lack of them serving beer; and Dave, well, he was too whiny, or tired, I don't really remember which. :P  Besides, I actually saw him speak at a Christian social justice festival in Kitchener just months after his release from captivity in 2005 - so I kinda already have a handle on his take of things.

The article in today's paper sums up his thoughts:

What if 30,000 to 40,000 Canadians willing to sacrifice their lives as soldiers were armed with non-violent tactics and objectives, Loney asked.
They'd be equipped with transportation and logistics of a military operation to bring in doctors, build wells and work with artists and educators in partnership to support what's already going on there, he said.
"Have we tried that? No, we've never tried that. So when we've tried it, we've spent $1.2 trillion a year on it, for 10 years, then maybe I will concede, oh, it couldn't work."

 Loney is Christian, and works for Christian Peacemakers, and his ideas do indeed mirror that of Jesus.  Going against the grain, doing things differently, thinking outside the box, walking a mile in another person's shoes, loving your neighbour, turning the other cheek, helping the downtrodden...  Ultimately, being a rebel in your desire to care for humanity, instead of following the crowd in hatred and violence.

2000 years we've been trying to learn these lessons.  It seems that as individuals we can figure out that when you punch a friend, he's going to punch you back and that it's way easier to just get along.  So why can't nations and countries figure this out? 

What do you want from me??

Ok, for some reason my blog comments have been commandeered by certain someones asking for specific post topics.  So much for just allowing the natural creative process to take place.  Since this is going to become a newspaper-esque reader-guided editorial column of sorts, making it my job/responsibility to entertain the masses, there will now be a monthly subscription fee for those readers wishing to read articles on specific topics.  The price is yet to be determined, but you'd better believe there will be HST added!  Also, starting soon there will be an Anne Landers-type 'help me, my life is falling apart and I need advice from a stranger because I have no one in my own life I can trust' feature.  All questions will be answered with lines from ABBA songs - it proves to be very informative and educational.  Be sure to subscribe today!

Anyhue, not wanting to leave my fans in the lurch...
Someone was wondering about eateries in OS.  I can't actually afford more than a jar of peanut butter these days, but I hear that the grease in Ted & Grace's fry truck hasn't been changed since about 1964.  It gives the fries a more intense taste (and a heart attack with every bite).  Just don't light a match anywhere near it, the whole thing could go up in a ball of flames.
Someone else was wondering about vacation destinations in and around the area.  The Paisley Inn isn't too far away.  It's been in the paper a lot lately; must be a nice place.  OR!  WE COULD GO TO THE QUEENS!!  WHAT A GREAT IDEA! * 

Here's your list of randomness for the day:
It seems that Moveber is upon us (a combination of the MOustache, and the month of noVEMBER).  I haven't personally seen an increase in moustache wearing men around, but Facebook seems to be all a flutter with excitement.  Apparently, young men especially will jump on any bandwagon which allows them to wildly grow their facial hair without being ostracized by the general public.  All you have to do is label it as a 'good cause'.   From what I hear, the good cause is prostate cancer.  I'm not exactly sure how growing a 'stache helps prostate cancer (or better yet, helps to find a cure), but it is what it is I suppose.

We all know that the giant waste of time, Facebook, has some pretty useless applications on it.  But there is something highly entertaining about a group of adults sitting around on a Saturday night having a very serious discussion about how to better manage their Farmville plots.  Farm Union talks are underway.

When you lead a life which can be neatly packed inside a square box, sometimes it's difficult to step out on the edge and do something a little daring.  Going against the grain, or throwing aside the rules, is next to unheard of!  But I challenge you to take the risk: the next time you play Settlers, instead of setting up the board in the normal oval-shaped fashion described in the rule book, take a chance and set up the board in any old funky pattern!  Add a lake in the centre of your island, or create two smaller islands connected with a land bridge.  Trust me, it'll spice up your life!

And one for the road...
Did you know that traditional Italian mozzarella cheese is made with milk from the Water buffalo?  I didn't believe it either.  But more importantly,  does everyone have a water buffalo?



*(For those of you not from the Grey Bruce area, this  is a line from an old radio ad.  For those of you who have lived in the area, you're now going to be randomly shouting 'OR, WE COULD GO TO THE QUEENS!!' all day long.  You're welcome.)

BEEP!BEEP!BEEEP!BEEP!BEEP!BEEP!

That's the sound my smoke detector makes when I burn things.  (stupid facebook distracting me)

You know, the smoke detector.  That little white disk attached to my 10ft high ceiling, which is just 1/2 an inch out of reach when I stand on a chair.

GAH

Guilty money?

I've been in financial report writing mode for the last couple days.  It'll be the last big financial update I do before I sink eyeball-deep into year end grossness.  Do you realize that there are only 7 weekends left in 2009?!?!  Ack!

I like my job.  Non-profit is interesting.  There is absolutely no way to predict whether or not you're going to run at a profit or loss for the year (let's face it, it's usually a loss) because your sole source of income is hoping that people give you money out of the goodness of their hearts.  ...not a very good long term business plan, but it's seemed to work so far.

So, in this particular financial bulletin I have made a nifty looking graph to track the pattern of donations over the year.  Naturally, donations spike around holidays.  Specifically, they're at their highest at Easter and Christmas.

Now here's where I go on my fun little bunny trail...

I've come to realize that the Easter donations are always higher than the Christmas donations.

Now to me, Easter (in the very loosest sense of the word) seems to be a time of realizing you're a horrible, horrible sinner and feeling kinda guilty about being the reason God had to die to save your sorry butt from all your sinning.

Christmas, on the other hand, is a time of joy and merriment and gift giving and fun!

Isn't that interesting.  People seem to donate more when they're guilty than when they are joyful.  Huh.

;)

We don't cater to requests here

Someone left a comment on my last post asking for a food blog.  I LOL'd.

I actually almost wrote a post about food just the other day.  It was going to be a poem.  About casseroles.  Because casseroles are awesome.

And then I realised that I had a beer in my hand.  So I stopped typing before things got carried away.  If you think drinking & driving is dangerous, just try drinking & typing!  ...It's got me in trouble on more than one occasion, so now I avoid it when at all possible.  True story.

My other true story for the day goes like this: The spaceship of a car I drive has these silly sensors in the wheels to tell you if your tires are flat.  Now, I'm pretty sure I could tell on my own if my tires were flat without a light on my dash turning on, but anyway.  (Gee... this ride seems a little rough, and I'm having trouble steering.  Must be the road though, there's no warning light lighting up on my dash.) 

Turns out, that light does actually work!  I've been driving around for an embarrassing amount of time, assuming a sensor was probably malfunctioning and ignoring that light on my dash.  Heh heh... Well, I guess my tires were actually a little under inflated.  (under inflated tires are better for traction anyway, right? ...all this cold slippery weather we've been getting.... *sigh*)  Needless to say, the light is off now, and it didn't cost me any money to fix.  I'll pay closer attention to it next time.  That 'check engine' light though... It can't be that important...  (kidding!  just kidding)

No good material

*sigh*  Every once in awhile my creativity well runs dry.  Apparently, people, (a very select few, but they are out there), seem to rely on my blog for a bit of entertainment.  I'm glad my writing can deliver once in awhile!  It makes me feel all warm & fuzzy knowing that I can spark a good laugh now and then.  But, when the creative juices quit flowing... well, I don't want to let anyone down, so I haven't been blogging much lately.  We'll have no half-assed blogging around here!

Anyhue
I just watched House.  I didn't, wouldn't, watch House for a long time cause I thought House was a really, really big jerk, and all the episodes seemed to be the same.  But somehow in the past year I've found myself watching it a lot.  It just adds to the list of Doctor/Hospital shows I watch.  Ok, well, I guess the list is still at two.  I used to watch ER and Greys, then I watched Private Practise for a season and Greys, then I watched ER and Greys again because it was ERs last season, and now I watch Greys and House.   MY Point is: Have you ever noticed that there seems to be a complete and utter lack of visitors moping around at the bedside of the sick and/or dying patients?  The best they ever have is a crazy teenaged friend who disappears halfway through the episode, or a distraught parent who shows up at the end just in time to see the patient make a miraculous recovery.  I'm pretty sure, I expect that, should I ever end up in that situation, I'd have 20 people a day traipsing though to see me - friends & family, co-workers & clergy... it's exhausting just thinking about it!  So are we supposed to believe that everyone who show up at Seattle Grace, or Mercy West, or Chicago Hope, or where ever House works, is a friendless, orphaned, social outcast?  Or does it just cost too much to hire actors who are non-essential to the plot line?  Suffice to say, it bothers me that they don't have more people visiting patients on Dr shows.

And speaking of no good material, I've been poking around the idea of starting a little crafty project so I've been wandering around the fabric section of Walmart a lot, (completely lost and unsure where to start.  Do you buy fabric by the yard or by the metre??), and their selection SUCKS!!!

Abs of Steel

...is what I'm gonna have if this cough lasts for much longer!  I tell yeah, there are certain advantages to getting the flu!

Speaking of steel, I got a free download for my Wii the other day.  Somewhere along the way, Nintendo decided to charge $5 to download their internet channel on the Wii.  But now they've changed their minds, made the download free again, and have given everyone who had to pay the $5 a rebate.  The rebate comes in the form of being allowed to download one classic NES game for free.  Naturally, I picked 'BLADES OF STEEL'.  Woo!  Nothing says 'Canadian childhood' like a good ol' button-mashing hockey game!

Blades of Steel, turns out, was a front runner in video game engineering in its day.  It was one of the very first games to use voice sampling - a real voice in the game.  Who, in their best commentator voice, hasn't mimicked 'BLADES OF STEEL' when turning on the game; or just when thinking about the game for that matter?  You're probably saying it right now!  I'm not sure anyone ever really understood what the commentator said when you passed the puck, but it was awesome anyway!  "It's a pass!", "With the pass", "What the puck"... ?

I remember playing this game for hours and hours as a kid - always letting my older cousin beat me of course.  But every once in awhile the actual hockey game would get a little dull, so we'd just skate our players around the ice and intentionally bash them into each other in hopes to start a fight.  What other hockey game rewards the winning fighter by carting the losing fighter off to the penalty box??  Pure gold!

If you'd like to relive a little bit of the Nintendo Entertainment System nostalgia for yourself, You can right HERE.  Yay for the internet - Bringing all our childhood dreams to reality!