Chipmunk: 14, Church Staff: 0

Chipmunk: 14 - that's about how many days the furry little critter has been living in the Rectory.
Church Staff: 0 - that's how successful we've been at getting rid of the little bugger.

My theory is that as cute as the little thing is, once he's become a nuisance (and eaten all your cookies), it's time to use some force.  Specifically, the sort of force found within a rat trap.  However, others in the building think we should be gentle to God's little creature and let him be free outside where he belongs.  Honestly, I don't live there, so I don't really care what they do with him.  Not only that but he has definitely provided some entertainment as we chase him through the office and down the halls.

We've managed to scoot him out the door once, and I have almost trapped him under an empty garbage pail, but other than scare him a little, we're not on the winning side.  It's an old building with holes in it big enough for a house hippo to get through, and an abundant supply of Chippy's favorite food; aka: the bag of sunflower seeds in the closet.  He's not going anywhere.  Rodents are cheeky little buggers too, and once they've stared death in the eye and won, they have no qualms about perching upon the back of a couch in the morning sun to eat breakfast - in plain sight of the receptionist.

Personally, if it were my house, I'd have a $2 rat trap and a bit of peanut butter out so fast that he wouldn't even know what hit him.  And I made my feelings quite clear as I helped push the couch out the front door because 'the chipmunk might be in the cushions'.  I wish I was joking, but that seems to be Fr's solution to most of his problems around the rectory - shove it out the door.

I understand the desire to not kill him, but this thing has become a pest.  He knows where all the holes are; he knows how to get in and out of every room; he knows where all his favorite food is; and he has some great places staked out to sleep in (you can tell by the little piles of sunflower seed hulls).  If you were to live trap this little thing, you would have to release him 20 miles away just so he wouldn't come back again - he knows he's got it good!

I may have likened the situation to having a nuisance bear - there's only one way to really permanently deal with a nuisance bear, and that's to kill it.  I was laughed at because 'Amy, you silly girl, there isn't a bear in the house, just a little chipmunk'.  Laugh if you want, Fr, but I wasn't the one who suggested calling the exterminator now was I?  Do you have any idea what it would cost to get an exterminator in to deal with that little chipmunk?!

RAT TRAP.  Problem solved.

Gah, it's a good thing I don't have to work for the next four days.  And there'd better not be an exterminator bill waiting to be paid when I get back!

Church work.  Never a dull moment.